As I am sitting here writing this post, I’m drinking my coffee cold, my hair is all over the place, I have no makeup on, my son is passed out across my lap, and the house is a WRECK. I’m still exhausted from yesterday, as my son has been teething and was crying all day. The sink has constantly been piled high with dishes, and the laundry basket filled to the brim. I’ve always had anxiety when there was any kind of clutter around the house, so having a baby has made it hard to accept that sometimes things just won’t get done, and that’s OKAY! My fiance came home from work yesterday and I kept apologizing for the way the house looked. His response was, “Honey, It’s okay. You have a full-time job. You’re taking care of our son! I am capable of helping too!” and that made me feel so much better.
Looking down at this perfect little human in my lap, I am realizing that it’s okay if things aren’t always perfect around the house, and I don’t always have to be put together. My baby doesn’t care about any of that, he just wants me to be there for him. All he cares about is that he has his mama to soothe him when he cries, feed him when he’s hungry, change his dirty diapers, and play with him. Things might not be perfect, but being a mom is.
I suffer from anxiety, and have a hard time with it on a daily basis. I get anxiety from things like going to the store, driving in traffic, when I’m trying to find an outfit to wear, and sometimes just randomly for no reason at all. One thing that was causing me the most anxiety though, was the fact that I was taking care of my little one, but also had all of these other things to take care of as well. I have now learned to just take one day at a time though. There are going to be days where I am not able to do this dishes, or vacuum, or even make the bed, but there will also be days where I’m able to drink my coffee hot, and if I have days like that, then heck yeah that’s great! But on those not-so-perfect days, I will at least be there for my son, and that is an accomplishment in itself. THINGS MAY NOT BE PERFECT, BUT BEING A MOM IS.